All My Single Ladies.....?

Bear with me people, I am having a moment. I am hating being single right now. It actually just hit me, about two hours ago while I was washing my hair. Actually, it truly hit me a few hours before, while I was out. I was in one of those big "Whole Foods"-y like stores that have begun to pop up all over Brooklyn now, and I had a flashback to me and my last boyfriend going to one of those stores to buy ice cream and fresh fruit and healthy snacks to combat the ice cream. It was a fleeting pang, and it went away fairly quickly. But, later, when I got home, another wave of sadness hit me. I don't know what it was about washing my hair that made me hate being single, but something in that moment did. Then, as I come out to dry my hair and clean up my place a little, what video do I see on MTV? You guessed it, "Single Ladies". I couldn't make this shit up. LOL

I've had conversations with friends in the past about how much a abhor that video and song. Beyonce really did a number on chicks, getting them to think that if they swing their right hand sassily in their mans' face he will in fact "put a ring on it". Simply because he likes it. Ha ha ha, oh, if the world was just that simple! Fact is, most of us don't have the luxury of being in a relationship with a 40+ year old rapper who is ready to settle down with one of the most successful women in the world. We are regular goddesses, living our regular glamorous lives trying to keep everything all together. There are plenty of men who might like it, but they are not ready to put a ring on it.

But, I'm not looking for all that anymore anyway. Fact is, it just kinda sucks spending 60 percent of your time alone. And aside from family, best friends and new experiences, at some point there are moments when you realize that you are by yourself. Now, there are plenty of times when I embrace this feeling, and I welcome being by myself and enjoying my own company (blog on THAT coming soon), but tonight, I just felt the pain of the lonlieness.

More so than missing the EX I think I'm just kinda missing being a part of a couple, which I think is something we all go through. What's so great about that damn song is that everyone sings along to it, and when you do you feel like you're a part of a sorority of women who all feel the same way you do. It's kinda like what it's like to be in a relationship, a part of a special group with inside jokes, special foods, places and memories you share with that one person. But, when all that ends, what do you do with all that relationship stuff? What is the best way to deal with those feelings? Getting over any relationship takes a while. Riding out the pain of figuring out life after a loss is tough. And, I should know, since this is my second loss in two years. I suppose the thing that helps the most is keeping busy, embracing the good feelings with the bad, and working through them whenever possible. I just wish Beyonce didn't try to make us single chicks feel better with that catchy ass song. *sigh*